Baby Booties & The Rest

I'm at that age where my nearest and dearest are coupling up and sprouting sprogs. Having previously thought that children were annoying and noisy small people commonly found in supermarkets, I have been swayed by the unfathomable loveliness of my friends' children. I can watch them like a box set of Mad Men....for hours and hours. I am told parents have to do more than watch but, for me, the loveable 'aunty' figure, I can just sit and gawk at their little brain cogs whirring round as they find joy in the simplest of things.

This fleet of newborns required celebrating and traditional gift giving. Reluctant to feed the overweight monster that is the baby products market, I decided to make my own baby booties out of felt. I got a pattern off the internet and customised them with different colours, trims and ribbons. This was reasonably straight forward and enjoyable and I was actually quite pleased with the result. I got a bit carried away and started making baby booties for anyone I heard had reproduced recently, including my boyfriend's saxophone teacher !?!

I got so cocky I decided to branch out into accessories and toys. Big mistake. Turns out the general principles of felt booties can not be applied to hats, stuffed star fish and rattles. The first miniature disaster came in the form of a hat (or a bar mitzvah cap) for the delightful Caelan Sheehan ( who is not Jewish, incidentally). Here he is (pictured above left) sporting said hat/cap. He is one and a half now and I made it for him when he was still a baby but, even then, it was ridiculously small. A banana has been added on the right for scale. It is not included in the skull cap and booties gift set.

Having amused Caelan's parents with his miniature hat, I was not deterred. I embarked on two toy-making projects at the same time: a stuffed starfish teddy and a rattle. The starfish was a bit of the wonky raggy-doll variety but it was looking reasonably presentable half way through.....until I gave it a face. It had wide circular blue eyes and a red smiling mouth. I thought this would make it look friendly like a cartoon face. Instead it looked manic and frightening like a drag queen on crystal meth and vaguely reminiscent of Heath Ledger as The Joker. This little gem went off to the lovely Elisha Lewis who sucked it, which is a sure sign of approval in baby terms.

Hot on the heels of this triumph I turned my attention to the rattle. I filled a plastic bottle half full with rice. I fashioned a handle out of wire and stuck that to the top and covered the whole thing in green tissue paper. It was looking odd but salvageable at that stage. I thought all it needed was a bit of brightening up so I glued on lots of multi-coloured shoe laces. This looked quite good but the plastic tips would catch as you ran your fingers round it- not a good thing for a soft, scratchable baby with eyes! I stuck fluffy pom-poms on the scratchy bits (disaster and a choking hazzard),  I put ribbons round it that kept moving out of place and then, in a moment of desperation, I covered the whole thing in sellotape. This gave it a surprisingly disturbing quality. I think it was the layer of clear plastic wrap that gave it an air of bondage and made the whole thing look more like a cheerful sex toy than a baby's rattle. After I had that thought, there was no salvaging it. It went in the bin, never to be seen again.

Has making baby booties and the rest changed my life?
I am still a keen bootie-maker. They make a fine alternative to the branded, twee, overpriced tat from the high street and they have the love and time I put into them. I wouldn't say they had changed my life particularly but it does make me smile knowing that these little booties are going into boxes that will be dusted off one day as a fully grown person is told that they were their first shoes.....and something about what a wonderful friend I was....so talented....so giving....blah blah blah. Legacy! I've got legacy!
Rating: 4/10
Comment: I found the edge of my capabilities fairly quickly with this one. If I can't be brilliant at it then it's not going to give me what I'm looking for....an identity through genius. I have given lots of treasured presents to friends at a special time in their lives, though, which means a lot to me. I have also invented a new line in comedy - comedic toy-making. It's quite long-winded but the punch line is hilarious.
Development Ideas: Make adult size felt booties for my hippy-friends......or maybe I could do a line in cheerful sex toys??